Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
