I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize