remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
