In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
