Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
