people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
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then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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