omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
