is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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