Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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