Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
