They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
