god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
