I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
