he thought i was a dude.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
