Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize