So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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