So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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