JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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