If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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