a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize