I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
did i just pee glitter
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