People in love make me want to vomit
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
