Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
