i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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