if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
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She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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