butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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