your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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