So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
