that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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