ugly people sure do ruin things
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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