My room smells like vodka and shame
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
The power of my boobs compel you
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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