Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize