I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
