my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
