stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
