it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
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I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
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I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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