Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
