Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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