What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
