so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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