there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
