Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize