Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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