I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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