OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
