I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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