im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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