She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party