I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Randomize
