it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i may or may not be watching the land before time
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
