As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
cat food counts as protein by the way
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
